- MATURE JENNY: - 'Christmas comes at the closing of the year.
'It is a time for reaching out, looking back,
'finding comfort in the magic of a season that endures.
'It is when we take stock,
'when we measure joy and pain.
'It is when we say this is who we are, what we have now become,
'and when we acknowledge what we cherish most of all.'
Philip?
I can't find it anywhere!
Are they in the box with the tree lights?
I would never put it in there!
Why would I?
It's a china ornament!
It doesn't go on the tree, it goes on the mantelpiece!
Er, perhaps the holly will be enough.
It's even got some berries on it this year.
Anyway, I'll soon get you a nice blaze going.
I don't know - I'm not sure if I'm a fool, or a romantic
or a creature of routine.
Last two.
Once a nurse, always a nurse.
We were so young.
Well, Sister Monica Joan must have been 80-odd, even then.
I think the word I'm looking for is "innocent".
Oh, we knew things, I'd seen things,
things I'd never seen before and never since, but...
..we had a way at looking the future in the eye.
Not frightened at all, only the young do that.
I wish I could find that ornament.
'A Christmas card seems such a frail sort of missive.
'A scrap of coloured paper folded to enclose
'a scant few words of greeting
'and if love is meant and not just included for the sake of form,
'a little line of kisses, neat and faint
'as the prints of birds on snow.'
A card from Jenny.
Lovely!
Keep on going round!
And round again, skipping as high as you can because we need to make sure
those headdresses stay on during the actual performance.
- Higher than that, please, Maxine! - I can't see where I'm going!
Well, keep on following Beverley. Beverley, you're doing splendidly!
Keep going.
- Oh! - GIRLS GIGGLE
Right, that's enough. That's enough.
Will all snowflakes please STOP dancing and stay where you are
until Nurse Franklin has had a look at your headdresses
and considered the case for a few more kirby grips, perhaps?
I strongly suspect there aren't enough kirby grips in the world.
How are you getting along with the snow?
- We've cut up enough for a small blizzard. - Afternoon!
Oh, Fred! You've come about your costume.
No.
I've come about the leaky tap.
Nurse Franklin, I can't believe you just did that.
What?
Referred to my costume when all the kiddies could hear you!
I didn't say what the costume was.
Well, they know I'm not in the concert!
They know I'm not in the Ballet of the Snowflakes
or the Donkey's Tap Dance.
Do you want a crimson velvet Santa suit,
or a corduroy one that's a bit more scarlet?
You're cutting it a bit fine!
I thought this was a fitting, not me being measured up from scratch.
Fred, why are you making such a fuss?
Everybody knows you're not the real Father Christmas.
- You're just helping him out! - Exactly!
I don't want to see any disappointed faces when I come in with my sack.
Helping out the big fella from the North Pole is a sacred undertaking.
To me, if not to you.
GIRLS GIGGLE
O Attic shape!
Fair attitude!
With brede of marble men and maidens overwrought
With forest branches and the trodden weed...
Is that Keats, Sister Monica Joan?
There is no end to your perspicacity
since you commenced walking out with a clergyman.
I did not think your mind could keep abreast of his,
but I was wrong.
SHE GASPS
I was just thinking what a good thing it was, that the crib was in its box
when the bomb went off,
- but one of the figurines must have been broken. - Oh, no.
Run it under the tap, quickly.
Oh! It is the sheep.
And it is shattered.
When will Herr Hitler cease his sport with us?
That's Mona Woollnet done and dusted. Little boy, name of Noel.
That's rather jolly.
We get Noels every year. Noels, Robins, Hollies, Carols.
You can set your watch by them.
Why isn't the autoclave on? Look at all these instruments!
Nurse Miller, I want this rectified.
Sister, I'm sorry, I'm expected in Sister Julienne's office in a moment.
Course you are. Off you pop.
- Thank you, Sister. - Autoclave!
After which, you can adjust your list
because I'm breaking into this bottle of Milk of Magnesia.
- Of course. - Patients will press snacks on you this time of year.
I gave in to a piece of sherry log, keeps repeating on me.
Mmm...
And lo!
A star was seen in the east,
and the donkey ears were found behind the bar.
- Where's Freddie? - I put him down for a nap. His cough's been rotten.
Poor little soldier!
I can smell the ale on them from here.
Tom Hereward confessed to a bit of larking about at the youth club.
He left the keys to the bar unattended.
He could be arrested for that.
"Failure to ensure the safety of minors at a place of entertainment."
You do work so awfully hard.
I don't want to fail my sergeant's exams again.
Peter, you say that as if you've failed them annually
since time immemorial! It's only been twice.
- Twice so far. - You could get arrested for that.
Offence against the Optimism Act, 1959.
Chapter 1, clause 1. "Failure to demonstrate a backbone under fire."
Nurse Miller, I know how deeply you've been considering this matter,
and I know how much you've been questioning your heart
and how hard you've been praying.
How could I not, when once I asked the same questions
and prayed the same prayers?
I thought I'd be certain by now. It's been months.
Sometimes it takes years.
That's why we speak of testing our vocation,
- beginning with six months as a postulant. - I know that.
I just... I don't know why I'm feeling this call. This longing.
Cynthia, you may take as long as you need to discern
what God wills for you.
But there will be several other postulants
joining the order at the New Year, and there is a place for you
- beside them, if you wish to take it up. - I see.
If you're not ready, there will be other possibilities.
In another 12 months, or possibly two years.
Sister Julienne.
Will you pray for me?
Always.
Go on, let me see how big yours are now.
- Happy Christmas, Nurse. - Liqueur chocolates! How decadent.
And a urine sample.
You are kind(!)
Shelagh, she's put on another pound.
She's doing so well.
I feel like the luckiest woman alive.
Ah, all my prayers were answered.
Just not in the way I expected.
A little bird tells me that a certain young lady
has come for her vaccinations!
And she can come right to the front of the queue.
Patrick, she'll catch her death of cold.
He's years older than her. Gives me the creeps.
Handkerchief, Denise.
I've forgotten it.
You think at 16 they're all grown up.
They'll start thinking for themselves.
Using their common sense.
You stop asking if they've remembered their hanky.
I haven't got mine either. You'll have to do without.
Here you are.
Wipe your eyes and have a good blow, old thing.
Now, it's not often we're able to refer our mothers-to-be
to Astor Lodge, but by all accounts it's absolutely splendid.
They only take 12 girls at a time,
and the matron there runs it as a proper home from home.
How long will she have it with her for? The child?
The general rule is that the little ones are cared for by their mothers
until the first stage of adoption goes through.
That's usually accomplished within six weeks.
I'm leaving mine at the hospital.
I told the social worker - I don't want to see it,
I don't want to touch it. I'm handing it over and that's that.
And where's your mother?
Yes, that's in your notes.
Nurse Mount will accompany you on the bus, and then hand over
all your paperwork to Sister Maltby when you arrive.
I hope there's not a long walk at the other end.
I've got a Dansette to carry as well as a suitcase.
You'd think you were on your way to Butlins.
Butlins?
I don't think so.
I'm more of a St Moritz girl, me, that's why I'm wearing my mink hat.
That's never mink.
Chocks away, I think!
Let's not smoke in the street, Avril.
I'd finished it, in any case.
- Are we slipping out the side way? - I think it's for the best.
She's never been away from home before.
I'm still hoping nobody'll find out where she's gone.
When Denise comes back, she can make a fresh start.
And from experience, no-one will ask any difficult questions.
At least she won't make the same mistake again...will she?
I'm sure she won't.
- < - Come get your Christmas tree!
- < - Right, come get your Christmas tree! Freshly cut...
What are you doing here, Sister?
You deem me incognisant of your purpose,
but I fear that were I to let you perform your task unsupervised,
Nonnatus would receive a very sorry tree indeed.
But Sister Monica Joan, Sister Julienne, she's put her foot down.
"Nothing too ostentatious," she said.
There is no ostentation in appropriate proportion,
only in vulgar ornaments and excess trim.
Look after the lady and gentleman, please, Victor.
I require a tree.
It should be neither too slender nor too squat,
of equal symmetry
and smell pleasingly of pine.
These all smell of pine. They are pine.
Apart from the spruces.
Then you may exhibit them to myself and my assistant.
Now, she can have any tree she wants.
You helped deliver my daughter Ingrid, Sister.
Boiling-hot weather, two doodle-bug raids.
'Ere, my missus still laughs about
how you had to fan her with her ration book.
Check the ticket when she's picks one, then halve the price.
Are these obtained from Germany or from Norway?
I don't know, madam. I'm only casual labour.
I would very much prefer a tree that sprang from Allied soil.
I'm sorry about my mum. I think your hat's lovely.
I'm particular about what I wear.
I worked in a dress shop up Roman Road before I started showing.
- It was my grandma's. - Come along. I'll stow the bags.
You get on board and choose some seats.
Oh, and your ma's right, it ain't mink. It's musquash.
What's musquash?
It's like a sort of weasel... only smarter.
I'm scared now.
I'm not. I've heard good things about these mother-and-baby homes.
And God knows, I need a bleeding rest.
SHE GASPS
The parlour corner?
It certainly is a tremendous-looking specimen...
THEY GASP
..but are you sure it isn't a little big?
I secured an advantageous price
and increased the scale of our purchase accordingly.
You can put it down there, mate.
SHRIEKS OF LAUGHTER
Isn't it wonderful?
- Thank you very much. Thank you. - Thank you.
(Here...)
Bag up some of these mince pies for him.
They'll still be sticking to his ribs come Christmas Eve.
I don't know what Mrs B is putting in that pastry.
Excuse me!
Sir!
We thought you might enjoy a few mince pies.
They're still warm. I can feel 'em through the bag.
Yes.
Happy Christmas.
Are you absolutely sure you can't just take it back to the market
and swap it?
Well, I can't now.
THEY LAUGH
You're late. You said five o'clock!
I got a full day down the market.
And a treat!
I done all right.
We'll keep some back for the meter
and the rest is going in here.
We'll fill it up in no time.
We haven't got no time, though, have we?
We've got about...four months?
Or five months?
Light the fire, eh?
Like you always do when you come home.
It certainly seems rather desolate.
I've never actually been before.
Makes sense, though, don't it?
We're being hidden away from society's gaze.
I've been hidden away from society's gaze, anyway.
My mum hasn't let me out without a coat on for four months!
And not a bleedin' fairy light in sight, neither.
BABY CRIES
Good afternoon?
CRYING INTENSIFIES
That's enough, thank you.
We don't touch other people's babies at Astor Lodge.
Hygiene regulations.
I'm an absolute tartar when it comes to cleanliness. Follow me.
CRYING CONTINUES
Your cockatiel's pulling its feathers out.
That's a sign of illness in a bird.
I've brought both the girls' notes, Sister Maltby.
Avril Fox and Denise Henshaw.
Once you're happy all the paperwork's in order,
- I'll leave them in your charge. - Which of you is which?
I'm Avril Fox. Miss.
I think you'll find everyone's a "miss" here.
And this is Denise. She has mild anaemia.
She's been prescribed iron tablets, but I think that...
I'll make sure she takes them.
The midwives and doctor at the cottage hospital will assess
her need for any further prescriptions.
BELL TINKLES
The labour bell! I have to get on, Nurse.
- Thank you. - Of course. - I like to give the girls
- my full attention once things get underway. - All right.
Good luck. Do let us know how it goes.
You won't hear nothing from me, Nurse.
- I'm putting all this behind me. - That's the spirit.
SHE GROANS
- Which one of you is it? - It's Lena, Sister Maltby.
Get upstairs and fetch her bag. I take it you did pack?
How many times do I have to tell you?!
Bags in the hall from two weeks before your due date. Hand!
Small.
That one looks about right.
Spare your blushes.
Follow me, you two.
BABY CRIES
Yvonne, he won't calm down if you don't put him down.
You're there.
- And you're there. - He knows what's coming up.
He can taste it in my milk.
The only thing he can taste in your milk
is all the vitamins the National Health are paying to put down you.
- Isn't that right, little boy? - His name's Nicholas.
Stop indulging yourself and him.
You're making it harder for both of you.
Well, welcome to The Grand Hotel(!)
Singing carols in the hospital is always my favourite.
Look, is it childish to be excited by the thought of snow
- for Christmas? - Yes.
I rather think we ought to save three pennies-worth
for Sister Winifred. We could leave them on her bed for her to find
- after compline. - I don't think she'd actually thank us for them.
When she went back with the nuns,
she looked as happy to be with them as we are to be together.
Yes, but it's hardly a normal life for a young woman!
Or an old one, for that matter.
One bath a week, chapel four times a day
and black-wool stockings held up with elastic garters.
You're talking about the things we can see,
not what goes on behind closed doors or in her spiritual life.
- It's what she feels called to do. - I can't argue with that.
Yes, Tom, but you lead an ordinary life.
You wear ordinary clothes, apart from your dog collar.
You live in an ordinary house and you're free to do ordinary things,
like marry, if you want to.
I can't argue with that, either.
But what if Sister Winifred didn't want just ordinary things?
What if she felt called to try to live a different way?
Cynthia, you're getting frightfully exercised by this.
Well...perhaps that's for a reason.
- Oh, good grief. - I'm not sure. I haven't made my final decision.
But the one thing I do know is that grief doesn't come into it.
I feel as though I'm on the edge of a truly great happiness.
Did you know about this?
Do come and talk to us about it, Cynthia.
I promise Trixie isn't in quite such a tizz now.
No. I don't want to discuss it.
SHE SIGHS
I can't believe it's what Cynthia really wants! I can't!
If she'd even had...one boyfriend.
If one man had so much as asked her out to the cinema
or held her hand or taken her in his arms and kissed her,
she wouldn't be in such a rush to throw her life away!
Trixie, I'm as shocked as you, but having a boyfriend
is NOT the be all and end all.
Besides, Cynthia doesn't seem to be rushing into anything.
Do you suppose there's no hope at all?
The trouble is... it's our hope versus her faith...
..and I'm not sure that that's a fair fight.
Colin's got a silver tree.
His auntie sent it from America.
She was a GI bride.
Well, Colin and his family clearly have very modern tastes.
- Your father and I are more traditional. - I know.
Timothy, a silver tree would just look plain silly in our sitting room.
But, Mum, it would save money.
We'd be able to get the same tree out every year,
and Angela would always be able to say,
"This is the tree we got the first Christmas I was born."
We're going to have a lovely spruce, and that's the end of the matter.
If you like, you can choose some
slightly-modern ornaments from Woolworth's later -
just to prove we aren't lagging too far behind the times.
Oh! Watch the baby!
- Victor! - I'm a trained nurse. Help me to get him onto his side.
- There's a risk that he might choke. - Some of the coal's burnt his leg.
Let me deal with the fit. Would somebody ring for an ambulance?!
- Harry, run to the phone box now! - It's all right.
It's all right.
I wish his dad could see him.
He's got a dad?
We wanted to get married, but we aren't 21 yet
and our parents wouldn't sign the papers.
What about you?
Oh, I packed mine in.
He used to come into my grandad's pet shop to get seed for his budgies
but I reckon caged birds were about his limit.
You'll start forming icicles if you don't get a move on!
I'm really hot. And I've got a headache.
WHISTLE PEEPS
Yvonne Corless! Matron's office, please!
You'd think we were rowing boats down Vicky Park lake.
- "Come on, number three, your time's up." - Pronto!
- Oh, dear. A dummy? - He cries without it.
Miss French just called to carry out final checks.
If you go upstairs and set his clothes on the bed,
I'll be able to tell the parents what clothes and bedding
to buy in ahead of his arrival.
He's due his feed in a minute. Can I do that first?
Set his clothes out, Yvonne, dear.
Pronto!
Denise ain't feeling well. She needs to see a doctor.
I'm sure it's nothing a lie-down won't sort out.
Up you go.
And don't come down till teatime.
I would never give him a dummy.
I'd never put one in a mouth.
Thank you. I'll ensure the doctor's made aware
and the duty district nurse. That was the London.
A Mr Victor McKenty has been discharged after a grand mal episode.
He suffered burns and will need dressing changes.
The gentleman with the seizure - he's one of our patients?
There's heat coming off you like you're a radiator!
- And you're covered in a rash! - Do you reckon it's my anaemia?
Well, you're pale enough.
But this is all over your neck... and behind your ears.
It's like blisters! CAR ENGINE STARTS
No.
No!
Nicholas! No...
No, you can't take him!
No! You can't take him!
- She can't take him! She can't! - She can! You've signed the papers!
You didn't say it would be today!
You didn't say I wouldn't be able to say goodbye
or feed him one last time...
It was time for his feed.
He'll wonder where I am.
I've had words about indulgence with you in the past!
I remember Victor McKenty.
He was discharged from the Countess of Irby Mental Home,
after the powers that be closed it down.
1933. Aged 16 years.
You only saw him once, in September.
You re-prescribed phenobarbitone. He had a routine appointment
booked for the end of November but he missed it.
The secretary should have noticed that.
Does he need the dose changing?
I suspect what he really needs
- is help in organising the routine. - Poor soul.
Why would you do that?
Why would you take a baby like that?
Because it prevents distressing scenes!
I suggest you take Yvonne a cup of tea.
I'm going to sit here quietly and have some hot milk.
Have one for me, while you're at it.
And you needn't think I can't smell that gin.
Put that receiver down this instant!
Regulations state that residents are not permitted to make calls.
Is that the operator?
I want to be put through to Nonnatus House, Wick Street, Poplar.
Pronto.
I reckon you're going to find the regulations state
all sorts of things - like not drinking on the job,
like keeping the place clean,
like making sure people get
the doctor sent for when they're ill.
PHONE RINGS
Nonnatus House. Midwife speaking.
Is that the posh one with the ginger hair or the one with the glasses?
- The one with the glasses. - Well...
..I've got news for you.
Avril was adamant that Denise Henshaw had a rash and a fever.
They're the only two on our books, but she said some of the girls
haven't seen a midwife or doctor for weeks.
Do you think she might have German measles?
Hello, old bean.
He's coming along for the ride.
To the mother-and-baby home?
It's all right. I quite fancy a bit of moral contagion.
That's enough, Tim.
I don't think I need to change this today, Mr McKenty.
I'll come back tomorrow and see to it then.
In the meantime, you mustn't get the burn wet.
We go to the public baths on Fridays.
Can he get it wet then?
Best not.
We'll come each day, though, so we'll be able to tell you when it's safe.
Dr Turner will be calling in later,
but he's sent a new prescription for your epilepsy medicine.
Will you be able to pop out to the chemist, Mrs McKenty?
We're not married.
And the prescription's too much money.
I shouldn't have presumed.
And I do know a shilling isn't always easy to find.
Nancy, love, why don't you make the nurse a cup a tea?
We've got a mince pie, if you want it?
That would be lovely.
She's shy.
I'm shy, too.
Mr McKenty, you stay right there.
Here, let me help.
Is someone expecting a baby?
Don't tell her, Victor.
Nancy...
We've got to tell someone.
Did you question her? Do you know how far along she is?
I didn't dare pry! I'd already pushed things as far as I could.
She seems very frail.
Well, she's spent half her life locked up in the Countess of Irby,
like him, I shouldn't wonder.
It's criminal how they've just turned them out onto the streets.
They're subnormal, they've been waited on hand,
foot and finger all their lives, then all of a sudden
they've got to manage money, cook for themselves,
clean for themselves.
You're on the midwifery roster.
You go with Nurse Miller next time she makes a district call.
See if we can talk some sense into the pair of them.
Run the engine and turn the heater on.
I don't want you with pneumonia for Christmas.
Can't be any worse than polio.
BABIES CRY
Your colleague's upstairs already.
What a terrible smell.
SWITCH CLICKS ON AND OFF
How long has the power been off?
Some bits of the house have got it, some haven't.
She managed to warm the milk to put in her gin, though.
The matron? Where is she?
Legged it soon as she knew I'd blown the whistle on her.
Follow me.
Chickenpox.
She'll need to be moved to a separate room and kept in isolation.
I want to go home!
Chickenpox can be frightfully tricky in pregnancy
for...for mother and baby.
SOBBING
They took her baby and she can't stop crying.
There, there.
He needed feeding.
Doctor?
Would you mind awfully taking a look at this young lady's eye?
I can see what the problem is from here.
Burst a blood vessel in her eye through crying?
I wouldn't have thought it was anatomically possible.
Mother-and-baby homes used to be run by small charities.
Then the councils took them over,
now nobody knows who's supposed to be in charge,
and you end up with a mess like this.
Dad, did Angela come from... a mess like this?
I hope not.
But she did come from a girl like these.
Ah, there you are!
Sister Monica Joan has arranged the figurines
in what she calls "conversational groupings".
What in the name of goodness is the Angel Gabriel
going to say to the ass?
Dr Turner telephoned from Astor Lodge.
He says until the matron is officially replaced,
we must have a qualified midwife in place round the clock.
- Oh, he does, does he? - I'm sending Nurse Mount.
And Nurse Noakes has agreed to commute there by bus each day,
- until we get proper care organised for the mothers and the babies. - Ohh.
There's nothing wrong with my knees! It's my lumbago.
And if it's not that, it's my indigestion.
- Sister, do you need a doctor? - No, I do not.
At least I'm in better shape than this poor wretch.
Got more scars than Frankenstein's monster.
I got this down the tip.
I told her, Nurse, I don't think it's clean enough.
It certainly needs a run-in with some Stardrops.
But I've seen older prams than this giving sterling service.
The thing is, Nancy, if you would agree to visit the doctor
and have your pregnancy confirmed, we can look after you properly.
I don't like doctors. Do I, Victor?
No, love.
They're not...
..kind.
Our doctor's very kind.
Besides, once you've filled in all your forms,
you'll qualify for the government maternity grant.
Baby's going to need a cot and clothes as well as a pram.
I'll come with you, Nance.
And so will I. We don't just want what's best for you.
We want what's best for baby.
Using your skill, judgment and encyclopaedic knowledge
of the Homicide Act 1957,
discuss the implications of the term "diminished responsibility".
This defence is distinguishable from the defence of insanity,
for while the former requires a substantial impairment
of mental responsibility arising from an abnormality of the mind,
the latter requires a defect of reason
- arising from a disease of the mind. - Top notch.
I don't think it's helping to try and do two things at once.
We'd be doing three things at once
if I was actually doing the thing that I most need to be getting done,
and that's decorating the Christmas tree.
BABY CRIES
Do you reckon we're in for another sleepless night?
I don't know. I had hoped the antibiotics would clear it.
I'm starting to think it's this filthy city air.
If I got my stripes, I could move us out to Redbridge or Walthamstow.
The air would be cleaner there. He'd have a garden to play in.
Let's see, shall we?
Sorry, Sister. I couldn't sleep.
Nor could I.
I was on my way to the clinical room for some aspirin.
For your hand?
Pain can be a sign that a wound is healing. It passes.
I keep thinking this will pass.
The questioning?
The wanting. I've never longed for anything so much in my life.
It seems to me that if that is what you're feeling,
the questioning is over.
I don't know why he wants ME, Sister!
I have nothing to give!
Nothing to sacrifice or offer up in exchange for all his love.
Once upon a time, I thought I knew what God had in mind for me,
but I didn't.
I thought I knew what love was but I didn't.
Certainty is fleeting.
That is why we must have faith.
- Thank you. - All right, my love, thank you.
Any more fares.
Tickets.
Ah, morning!
One of our young ladies went into labour in the small hours.
I sat up with her, she left in an ambulance half an hour ago
after she'd had some tea and toast.
Give us them sheets, Nurse. I'll get them in the laundry hamper.
That's the spirit!
Don't know what I would've done without Avril last night. She's the perfect marvel.
How did you come by this scar on your tummy?
I had an operation.
At the Countess of Irby?
Helped me with my monthlies.
Were you in pain?
No.
They said it would help them to stay regular.
I had it when I had the operation on my head.
Can you remember why they did this, Miss Williston?
Because I couldn't keep still.
I couldn't keep still inside, in my brain, or outside in my body.
It was like I always wanted to dance.
And afterwards?
Like there wasn't any music any more.
That was the psychiatrist who supervised the closure of that hospital.
Said his predecessors were notorious.
Lobotomy. Leucotomy.
A lobotomy? Without her consent?
If she'd been committed, she wouldn't have been asked for it.
There's a chance she wouldn't have
understood the implications if she had.
Ready?
I'm afraid you aren't going to have a baby, Nancy.
Doctor believes your monthly periods have stopped
as part of a natural process called the menopause.
Happens to all women,
some time between their 40s and their 50s.
I'm not that old.
Doctor believes you might be.
He's sent away for your medical records, so we can all be sure,
but...
he is absolutely certain that you aren't expecting.
She might still get pregnant.
I might.
If I eat right and do all the proper things,
I still might.
And I can look after her.
Nancy, Doctor thinks the operation on your tummy
was something called a tubal ligation.
It was actually done by the doctors
to prevent you from ever conceiving a child.
What does "conceiving" mean?
It means...to make and to carry.
Have I imagined it all?
Have I been ill in my head again?
No. You just wanted it very much.
And that's understandable.
I'm so very sorry, Nancy.
SHE WAILS
Nancy!
I love you!
Don't say you love me.
Please don't say you love me.
Don't say that.
But I can't give you anything.
I can't...can't fill in anything that is missing.
You give me what you can. I give you what I can.
My blessing is that you let me.
I ask for no more, and we're both made whole by it.
NUNS SING SOFTLY
CHATTER
# Little donkey, little donkey
# On the dusty road
# Got to keep on plodding onwards
# With your precious load! #
That was absolutely lovely,
although I'm sure if Nurse Noakes were here,
she would say the donkeys would be a little bit more proud.
Mm-hm?
You OK, Beverley? Can I see?
- Her tooth's fallen out! - Oh, go to the kitchen, Beverley,
and rinse your mouth out with some water.
You can take your friend with you.
Second verse...
It's the cotton wool. It's just not convincing.
I think you're worrying about nothing.
# Been a long time, little donkey
# Through the winter's night... #
Don't give up now.
# ..Don't give up now, little donkey
# Bethlehem's in sight. #
APPLAUSE
That was very good, well done.
SCREAMING
Oh, no, it's Fred.
What a shame. You've spoiled Fred's wonderful surprise!
He's going to be doing such a lovely song and dance number
at the concert. We were just trying his costume on.
I checked on Denise and reapplied the calamine.
The spots seem to be drying out nicely.
Yvonne seems to be picking up a bit too. PHONE RINGS
Astor Lodge. Acting Sister speaking.
'It's me, Camilla.'
This is an unexpected pleasure.
How was Freddie when you left him?
A bit chesty. There's a couple like him at nursery.
I need you to test me on procedure.
'Peter, I'm at work. I don't have any of the manuals.'
You know them back to front and inside out, Camilla!
This is just nerves, Peter. I promise you.
I've got the 1872 Licensing Act going round and round in my head
like a hamster on a wheel.
Peter, the exam's tomorrow. I'll be home tonight.
We'll sit in our dressing gowns with a cup of Horlicks,
I'll test you then.
'I love you, Camilla.'
Chummy, have you seen outside?
Oh, botheration!
I rather think Wellingtons might be in order!
Nonsense. These brogues have never been confounded.
I'll be on that bus before you can say "knife".
# ..The sea, the sea of love
# I want to tell you
# How much I love you
# Do you remember... #
Stop! Halt! Wait!
# ..That's the day I knew you were my pet... #
Ohh! Oh, God.
# ..I want to tell you how much I love you... #
Ow!
BUS BELL RINGS
Blast! Wait, please.
I'm anxious about you going anywhere in these conditions.
It's not a long walk to the station, and the trains are running as usual.
I do need to tell my parents face to face.
Of course.
Sister, is this sheep being thrown away?
Do you want it?
Oh, no. I'm going to be laying possessions to one side,
but I know someone who would love this so much.
I desperately wanted to be at home tonight.
Peter needs me.
As does Freddie.
The buses have stopped running,
they've just announced it on the wireless.
And much good you'd do them, dead in a ditch like Captain Oates!
Thank you.
(Are you ready for beddie-byes?)
No Mama for us tonight, Freddie.
We're looking at a boys' night in.
MUSIC: Santa Bring My Baby Back (To Me) by Elvis Presley
Come on, give me a twirl. I want to be twirled!
# Please make these reindeer hurry
# Well, the time is drawing near
# It sure won't feel like Christmas
# Until my baby's here
# Fill my sock with candy
# And a bright and shiny toy... #
Come on! No wallflowers allowed!
# ..And to fill my heart with joy
# Then, Santa, hear my plea
# Santa, bring my baby back to me
# Please make these reindeer hurry
# Well, the time is drawing near
# It sure won't feel like Christmas
# Until my baby's here
# Fill my sock with candy... #
Girls, here I go!
Whoo!
- That's it, Chummy. - Ooh!
# ..Then, Santa, hear my plea
# Santa, bring my baby back to me
# Then, Santa, hear my plea
# Santa, bring my baby back to me... #
ANGUISHED WAIL
Avril?
MUSIC AND LAUGHTER DOWNSTAIRS
Well, it's very much curtains up and light the lights time!
You sure you aren't making a mistake?
That's it.
You just...you just meet that bally pain...head on,
let it know who's boss!
Does it get worse than this?
Guide's honour?
I was never in the bloody Guides!
Well, it does get a smidgen more intense,
but not for very long.
You can hold my hand when we get to the sharp end.
I don't want to hold your hand.
I just want to go to the hospital.
You're out of luck there, I'm afraid.
The ambulance can't get through
so you'll just have to make do with us two!
BABY GRIZZLES
BABY COUGHS
COUGHING GETS LOUDER
Freddie?
It's OK, ssh, ssh. It's OK, ssh, ssh.
You can let it out, you know.
There'll be absolutely no mention in despatches
for keeping a stiff upper lip.
You can squeal like a stuck pig, if you like.
No-one'll hear you.
My mother used to say that.
I learned how to stay as quiet as a mouse.
Funny thing was...
I did it to please her at first...
..then I knew I never would.
I started to do it out of spite.
Do what?
Bite my tongue.
Not cry.
She'd get bored quicker, hit me less.
No-one's going to hit you now, old thing.
Guide's honour?
Absolutely.
I shouldn't make you tell me the truth. I've lied and lied.
That's of no consequence at all just now.
I never knew my grandparents.
They didn't have a pet shop.
My mum dumped me in Dr Barnardo's,
left me there with all the other little bastards.
Mrs Torpy.
Mrs Torpy!
Hello?
BABY COUGHS
SHE GROANS
(It's OK.
(There we go.
(Well done.)
That's it.
Breathe.
Well done.
Baby's head's well on its way.
Did you hear that, Avril? The finish line's in sight.
It looks like it's a compound presentation.
Avril, listen to me.
Now, all will be well,
but it looks like baby's wanting to be born
with his hand held up against his head.
- I just want this to be over. - I know.
It's a rotten business, but if you do as we tell you,
it really won't be much longer.
BABY COUGHS
It's going to be all right.
Ssh-ssh-ssh.
- OPERATOR: - 'Fire, Police and Ambulance.
- 'Which service do you require.' - Ambulance.
I've a 14-month-old baby who can't breathe.
'We are advised that due to adverse weather,
'it is taking up to 90 minutes for ambulances to...'
- SHE SOBS - Not too hard, Avril.
We need nice, steady pushes.
I can't...
Yes, you can.
Good girl, Avril.
BABY COUGHS
It's Freddie. I don't know what to do.
Whatever is the matter?
The child has croup. I have seen it a thousand times.
And the best remedy for the malady is steam -
equal child of engineering and of nature.
Ssh-ssh. It's OK.
BABY CRIES
Good girl, Avril! Good girl!
That's it. That's it.
Am I doing it wrong?
No. Believe me, if you were on stage at the Albert Hall
the audience would be on their feet and cheering!
I want the baby to be all right.
I don't want it to be hurt.
SHE SCREAMS
That's it.
Well done.
- Bravo, Avril! Bravo. - Well done.
Well done!
It's a little girl.
She looks rather like Ma, if I'm not very much mistaken.
Be a sport and take a peek.
You worked so hard.
No.
The fever has broken.
May the Lord be praised.
Did you hear that? Come here.
I've had two hours' sleep.
I can move mountains on two hours' sleep.
So can you, you're no stranger to the night shift.
There! You'll do.
Now, we will be fine until you get back.
Remember, one stripe, two stripes, three stripes -
none of it's worth tuppence ha'penny,
compared with what you've got already.
I know.
Thank you.
I don't want to see her.
If I believed that, I wouldn't be standing here,
holding your beautiful daughter in my arms.
She's not going to be my beautiful daughter.
She's going to be somebody else's beautiful daughter.
Or else she can go in a home, like I did.
Avril, you can give us a bravura performance of not caring
if you like, but last night when the chips were down, you did
everything you could to bring this baby safely into the world.
You did everything YOU could.
You carried her inside you for nine months.
Your body sheltered her and nourished her.
It still could, if you wanted to feed her.
What for?
We're both on our own now, might as well get used to it.
Avril, you're going to be together for weeks.
I just wanted a nice life.
A happy life...
..with proper things in it, like other people had.
And a home - with a small "H", not a capital letter.
You wanted love, that's not unreasonable.
I thought I had it...
with him -
the one I went to bed with.
And I was wrong.
Love doesn't always come in the package one expects,
and this little one was born reaching out for your hand.
Well...
more fool her.
(It's all right.)
You may turn over your paper and begin.
BABY CRIES
Any news from Peter?
Not yet. I think he'll still be in the exam.
I asked Avril if she'd like to feed baby.
She gave me my marching orders, in no uncertain terms.
It's bally wrong, you know - locking girls away like this
and then forcing them to make their choice.
But it isn't a choice, that's the thing.
Places like this make the shame and the stigma even worse.
Avril was illegitimate,
she grew up in a home.
All she needs is love.
She needs love so badly
she ended up bringing a daughter of her own into the world.
- She daren't even look at her... - KNOCK AT DOOR
..never mind love her.
Excuse me, Nurse,
only I just went past Denise's room and she was crying.
I want my mum.
Shall we see if we can get her on the telephone?
I...I don't think she wants to know.
Oh, I'm sure that's not the case.
Come on. There we are.
I wondered where you'd got to.
You look sad.
I couldn't be happier.
For us.
Our daughter started life as someone else's child.
How can we ever forget that?
I forget it a hundred times a day!
Then I remember,
and my heart breaks for the poor wee girl who gave her up.
And it's Christmas.
She'll be thinking, "Is she loved?"
Can I hold her?
She's your baby.
There's no need to ask.
The young madam's just been indulging in a spot of luncheon.
It's like we fit into each other.
Like we're two pieces of a puzzle.
I don't want her thinking I didn't want to know.
How will I ever give her up?
She might need me one day.
She needs you now.
There's no law that says you can't keep her.
No.
There isn't, is there?
We do all understand that this letter
may never reach the baby's first mother.
It may be that all the adoption society will do is
keep it on file, in case she ever makes enquiries.
- I still think we ought to try. - Very well.
"Your daughter is now known as Angela Julienne
"and she is ten weeks old.
"She has blonde hair, she has an older brother, Timothy,
"and our family lives..."
..in a flat with a natural Christmas tree.
GENERAL HUBBUB
Shall we take our seats?
LAUGHTER
APPLAUSE
PIANO MUSIC PLAYS
# When Santa got stuck up the chimney
# He began to shout
# You girls and boys won't get any toys
# If you don't pull me out
# My beard is black...
# My nose is tickly too
# When Santa got stuck up the chimney
# Achoo, achoo, achoo! #
APPLAUSE
Merry Christmas!
Thank you for looking after me.
- All part of the service! - No, thank you, Nurse.
Bye, everyone.
- Bye. - Bye, Yvonne.
# I dream tonight of a place I love
# Even more than I usually do
# And although I know
# It's a long road back
# I promise you... #
Is he all right?
Chickenpox didn't hurt him?
Doctor's been. Says he's fine.
# ..I'll be home for Christmas... #
I should have made sure you caught it when you were a little girl.
I always did everything I could to protect you.
It's all right, Mum.
He's my first grandchild.
There'll be others. But he'll always be the first.
He'll always be my first.
You can change your mind.
If I did,
I'd be doing what I want most now.
Not what's best.
Not for him or for me.
I know.
And I'll think about him every Christmas.
- MATURE JENNY: - 'If not every wish can be granted at Christmas,
'it is still a time of generosity and gentleness,
'of gathering together and closing out the world,
'and amongst all the glitter and the gifts, one precious thing
'shines brighter than the rest,
'and that is the simple act of sharing all we have,
'and the season made complete.'
- Oh! Where did it go? - CRACKER POPS
LAUGHTER
- TV: - 'Never in the field...'
LAUGHTER
Pass.
Can't believe I'm doing this.
It's New Year's Eve!
We could be out having high jinks
with the junior doctors at the London.
But we're here, though, aren't we?
Waving Cynthia off for six months in the Mother House!
And I'm so glad.
I decided when I saw you I was going to say, "Ready?",
as if it was your wedding day.
But there's no need for me to ask that at all, is there?
And I'm coming back.
They've already told me I'm coming back here.
But they might change your name.
You might be called something else.
Be somebody else.
But you won't.
# If I take the wings of the morning
# And dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea... #
- MATURE JENNY: - 'Sometimes Christmas is made more exquisite
'by the change it brings.
'New beginnings, accepted with grace,
'become beloved memories
'and their beauty shines for ever.
'Dear faces under glass.'
Oh, look!
Snow!
Philip!
Ah, perfect.
And now...
something to make it all truly complete.
Well, it wouldn't be Christmas without this, would it?
SHE CHUCKLES SOFTLY
Oh, it gets more delicate with every year that passes.
- Doesn't get any better looking, though, does it? - No!
- MATURE JENNY: - 'If we are lucky, we find love.
'If we're blessed, we understand its meaning.
'The bird-print kisses at the bottom of a card
'will not vanish like the snow but will endure.'
You know you should get it down on paper.
What?
Write my memoirs?
I think you should consider it.
I will...
..after Christmas.
# I'll hang my heart on a Christmas tree
# And wish on a silver star
# That from this night you will always be
# As close to me as you are... #